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kim kardashian likes me!


sitting on a plane, walking through the grocery store, buying a snack at a deli or airport or fruitstand, the tabloids (yes, most mags fit this category) just gush over the latest on kim (or her sisters), brittany, brad, or angelina. we get a front-row seat to the mess that is their lives. and the messier it is, the more coverage it gets.

the thought on my mind as i glance over at seat 4B, is "are we caring about this?! why?"

basically, kim is a human being, or was once, before we made her and her friends into hollywood monsters. i'm sure she was a very nice person. but exactly why am i caring about her awesome marriage or the schwetty (as in bawls) divorce? or "oh no he won't divorce me and it isn't fun any more!"

i'm sure different people have many varied opinions on the people in hollywood, on the cover of magazines, and those cutting cd's. as a Christian, i am called to care about all God's creatures, human or otherwise. that does not mean i have to particularly like them, although i really don't have feelings about kim, except sadness and pity. i'm sure she has had dreams, i'm sure she has had heartache. i'm sure her marriage and subsequent issues are not totally her fault. they never are... and yet, in marriage, you both are responsible for success and failure. this is where careful selection of your mate is vital.

but we set kim and others like her up for failure all the time. me? you? sure. how, you may ask? by reading the trash... by talking about it... we set them up for failure by worshipping them, by giving them all they think they want, for using them and being used by them. that is the whole life of many famous people... to use and be used, and in the end hope you used more than you were abused, and can thus "come out on top". fame is very seductive. it offers a feeling of importance, but unlike McDonalds coffee, doesn't come with the disclaimer: CAUTION! MAY CAUSE SEVERE INJURIES. most famous people are so unaware of fame's treacherous nature that they don't recognize their own peril until they are nearly hopelessly addicted to the feelings, the scene, the life. and that life will pwn you.

as a relative smalltimer in the fame-game, i have still spent considerable time in contemplation, in prayer, and sometimes falling to the addictions. often having to "take off" the many blessings that have been dumped on my head in order to see life soberly. what is the difference between brittany spears and other talented singers/dancers (ok, be nice, i realize she's easily ridiculed at this stage in her scene-addiction)? i look at my own path, and how many things simply "came together" that could have easily gone a different way. i have certainly been blessed with opportunity, and status. for the past six years i have fought to earn the fame and reputation that i still don't deserve... to be a person of integrity, to live up to those expectations of me. during that time i have experimented with different lifestyle changes that may or may not help in my life, but could possibly have helped with my abilities, and sometimes, simply for the sake of the game... to further my already overly-inflated ego and reputation. there have been many times the addictions could have pwned me, and without the wisdom i request from above, and the humility i'm often reminded to strive for, i could be just as screwed up.

but i've been married for 13 years now. more or less happily, but ever committed. i've sacrificed, and caused pain to myself and my wife, and occasionally my kids. and they still love me, and i them. you see, the thing that makes famous people (and their marriages) so interesting to read about is the drama and typical failure that ensues. marriage requires a few things that we entice out of famous people if they let us... humility (true humility), integrity, and commitment. i understand the draw of feeling like a rock-star... i often have good-intending friends pushing that on me, and it feels good... real good. but the rock-star status can make us think too highly of ourselves... get us used to having our own way too frequently... of worship and flattery. sadly most of us don't want to seek out honest criticism, so when it comes it often comes in harsh ways, making it even more difficult to accept, and easier to dismiss without addressing real issues.

on a side note, it would be easy to presume that i believe fame is inherently evil, that it should be avoided at all cost, and that all famous people are stupid or also evil. that is far from the truth! fame is both blessing and burden... powerful, and perilous. but fame is a tool that can be used for immense good. it can provide spotlight for insights into Truth and benefit, provide incentive to excel, and provide the right people with the ability to cause good to happen. how would you use fame for others' benefit? and now back to our regular program....

i once had a close friend tell me "you only show your love by what you sacrifice for something/someone." this person's rock-starness dwarfs mine, and i'm sure he has to deal with these issues every bit as much as i do... but that meant a lot to hear. i have sacrificed for my family. i love them and they me. love is a commitment, to desire their benefit even if i don't like it... and even when i don't like the way the person is behaving. this is the kind of love we are called to have in a marriage and in family.

so i ask you this... how can these famous monsters we've created ever find longevity, success, and fulfillment in marriage? they first must find humility, integrity, and commitment... find kindness in their hearts... and commit to sharing it over the rest of their lives. next, they recognize that it's ok to feel good about yourself, but not beneficial to anyone to think that you are more important than other people. humility. i may be better than most people in certain areas of my life and career. but that does not make me more important than others. i'm thankful for the compliments, and grateful for the praise. but know this: all of us in the limelight have to struggle with pride, with fear of the loss of our fame, with megalomania.

so i'm sorry for misleading you, kim kardashian doesn't really like me. she likely will never even know me. but should we really care? i feel sorry for her and kris, and everyone else drawn into the vortex of fame without the anchor of Truth. focus on your own lives, and leave them to theirs. until they do something atrocious with the spotlight we give them, it really doesn't concern any of us. they will have a hard enough time trying to relate in this world without our paying $3.99 for every magazine smearing them and their personal lives across its pages.

oh, and if she did like me? i'm sorry, but i'm already taken.

con cariño,
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